Changes are the only permanent reality. To adapt to unwanted changes, choose your changes. Adapting to changes is a change choosing process. Adapting to the forced changes has been a process of changing my thoughts so they’re consistently caring and productive. More than ever, I see that what goes around comes around. For me, adapting means choosing to be part of a community where the activities I devote myself to support mature and caring values. I identify with the activities I do and in some ways become like the people I spend most of my time with. So, in a sense, the community I choose to be part of and the activities I participate in are the authorities that determine my values and priorities.
Who Controls, You or Fear of Change?
A number of spiritual and professional people helped me change my authorities, so fear is no longer behind why I think and feel the way I do. Because of my communities, I’m back in the driver’s seat. I’m taking back my power!
Like tanks, fears can be unquestioned authorities. I changed. Fears no longer govern my thoughts and behavior. The communities I choose to be part of gives me the courage to choose healthy authorities, which means I can have healthy priorities. Fears generated by my disability or any other changes no longer have authority over me.
Wrong priorities are self defeating
By changing my priorities from worrying what people think of me to caring about others, my chosen authorities plunged me into the unknown. At first, making these changes required supreme effort. To break out of my comfortable molds of self concern and change to my newly chosen value of caring about others, I had to fight against both natural and cultivated tendencies. The beginning was tough, but the rewards are plentiful, and it gets easier with practice.
“The key to genuine happiness is in our hands. To think this way is to discover the essential values of kindness, brotherly love and altruism. The more clearly we see the benefits of these values, the more we will seek to reject anything that opposes them; in this way we will be able to bring about inner transformation.” Dalai Lama
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