Helpful Attitudes are Sensible Attitudes.
Boundaries are an illusion.
Whether we have a disability or not, the idea that there’s a boundary between self and others, that we can see ourselves as valuable and lovable regardless of how we treat others is false.
Any Attitude that sees itself as separate denies the connection that we all share.
Our Attitude Buckets are Connected..
The harm in denying our mutual identity is that this Attitude is passed on to new generations of people who never realize their responsibility for the effect their Attitudes have on those around them..
Our mutual identity is clear when it is realized that we each have what, for the sake of clarity, we’ll call an Attitude bucket. An Attitude bucket contains a person’s identity, what they think of themselves—their self esteem—their level of self respect. In other words, this bucket contains their ATTITUDE.
Whatever I do that affects your Attitude bucket is going to have the same affect on my Attitude bucket. If I show you disrespect in a way that impacts your self esteem in a negative way, it’s like I’m poking holes in your Attitude bucket. Being aware that I’m poking holes in your bucket lessens my social value, in my eyes, and so poking holes in your bucket results in my poking holes in my own Attitude bucket.
Since how I effect your bucket is how I effect my bucket, what I do to add positive things to your bucket adds positive things to my own bucket. In other words, it behooves me to add positive things to your bucket by accepting the ways that you are different than I am.
- When I make positive additions to your Attitude bucket, I’m making positive additions to my own Attitude bucket.
- We’re given the Golden Rule: Love others as you love yourself, because Attitude buckets are connected.
- Why should we love others? Because, there are no boundaries.
- Because boundaries are an illusion, acceptance is a vital survival skill.